Hope chest draws memory of auctioneer
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David L. Green
Published: March 11, 2008
I had previously written some thought for a column, which I didn’t have room for last week, but I’ll share now, if Tina and Kim still have room.
The auctioneer at the Ducks Unlimited banquet sold a nice foot locker among all the other goodies. He said that years ago they were called hope chests or I.W.W. chests. The I.W.W. stands for “I wonder when,” he said. Then after the wedding it stood for “I wonder why.”
He reminded me of an old-time auctioneer that I used to go to see. I went to college in a small town in the beautiful Genesee Valley — in fact, the college was the town. We had some very fine artist series events and such, but there wasn’t much “lowbrow” opportunities for entertainment either on or off campus. But there was the Saturday night auction.
The auction was held in a ramshackle barn in a nearby village, just about as tiny as the village we were in. It was primarily attended by old farmers and their wives — and college students. In the winter there’d be several old stoves (probably culled from the auction supplies) running red hot and hardly warming the place.
The auctioneer was a little old guy who had a quick wit and must have had a million jokes in his repertoire. His presentation was so unique that you would leave the auction with sore muscles from all the laughing.
I wish I could find stuff today, like the things sold then. That was the middle of the 20th century, but plenty of stuff that came up for sale dated back to the 19th century. Every now and then the sale would include all the contents of an estate sale from one of those old farm houses and you just didn’t know what would come up.
But you could find out soon after, even if you didn’t go to it. I remember the Sunday morning when there was a pair of bloomers flying high on the campus flagpole, and we knew someone had been to the auction. The bloomers flew for a good portion of the day, because the maintenance staff was off duty and it was awhile before someone in the right position noticed it.
Every now and then you’d see a bunch of co-eds dressed in long dresses and bonnets like pioneer ladies and you’d know someone had been to the auction. One time one of my friends brought back several boxes of beaver ties that he probably got for fifty cents a box. Beaver ties were a turn-of-the-century style that was about a foot wide. You could use them as a bib. Anyway, they were passed out, and it was a status symbol for the day at least, if you were one of the guys wearing a beaver tie.
It was great fun and the Saturday night auction was always there — rain, shine or blizzard. You could find real bargains, especially if you were looking for bygone artifacts like a whalebone corset or a harness to hitch your team to the plow.
Event for all ages
Speaking of Ducks Unlimited, it was nice to go to an event that was attended by all ages. There aren’t many events nowadays that are attractive to all.
Fan turnout
The basketball games lately have been another such event. It was great to see the fans of all ages turn out for the Hemingway — Calhoun playoff game. Tiger fans packed the stands at the Colonial Center, and you just can’t beat the experience of seeing Grandmama holler her head off for her grandson.
Here’s hoping that by the time you read this, I’ll be back in the harness!
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